A Broken Kettle of Fish
The “absurdity” of pleading mutually exclusive alternative facts has long been a target for those looking to poke fun at attorneys for being dishonest or unscrupulous, writes Jake Crabbs in his April Illinois Bar Journal article, “A Broken Kettle of Fish.” The title of Crabbs’ article alludes to an old joke about a man sued for breaking a borrowed kettle: First, the man argued that he “never borrowed the kettle; second, that it was cracked when he borrowed it; and third, that it was sound when he carried it back.” Crabbs states that a lack of personal knowledge is the touchstone of proper alternative fact pleading, and goes on to explain why alternative fact pleading is a useful, and sometimes necessary, legal tactic.